Are You A Contentious Wife?

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It is better to live in a corner of the roof Than in a house shared with a contentious woman

Proverbs 25:24

Scripture tells men to run, be as far away as you can be from a contentious woman. Live in a corner of a roof. Assuming the wife is in the house, and he is far away from her as possible. Contentious also means quarrelsome, contrary, pugnacious, argumentative, defiant, hostile, and antagonistic. Not a pretty picture is it.? Don’t even the words alone, make you cringe with the strife and discord that they relay? They do not describe a woman that is caring and loving to her husband or even her household, but rather one that demands her own way. These words describe an ugly distorted picture of a woman that has no fear of God. That seeks her own way, at the expense of others.

As women of God we are called to be the very opposite of this picture. Our calling as wives and mother paints a beautiful picture of a God -fearing woman, that flowing from her love for God comes welling out of her, love for her husband and family. She wants the best for her husband, not wanting to always stumble and correct him. Arguments happen but she does not seek to be argumenative at his every word. 

Being that contentious woman is a temptation at times for Christian women, and sometimes we give into that temptation. If there is one thing, we as women understand, is that are tongues can be very hurtful and that is why we are told in Proverbs 15:4 A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.

She opens her mouth with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

Proverbs 31:26

Our words should be used only for healing, encouraging and restoring. Our first obedience is to the Lord, and out of that obedience comes our love for husbands and children, in a manner that is honoring to God. When we are contentious, we are causing undo strife in our homes. Strife stifles, it suffocates joy. We want joy, peace and unity in our homes, and as much as in our control that should be our goal as godly women. This does not only benefit our households, but it encourages us. When our households are at peace and our husbands are at rest in them, our souls are blessed. 

We always see blessings in our obedience to God. Our obedience does not contribute to  our salvation but rather an outflowing of that salvation that we received by grace.

Some things to think about:

  1. When you’re tired to you tend to be contentious? (What I do, is I know that when I am tired, I am cranky. And I focus on not being contentious)
  2. As women we know our words can either heal or hurt. What are the ways you avoiding being contentious?
  3. Being contentious is not fruitful but destructive. (Let us remind ourselves that contradicting our husbands isn’t helpful or loving.

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